{"id":187,"date":"2015-05-01T12:08:06","date_gmt":"2015-05-01T15:08:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/memo.geovanesou.com\/index.php\/2015\/05\/01\/meu-irmao\/"},"modified":"2025-12-26T00:01:55","modified_gmt":"2025-12-26T03:01:55","slug":"my-brother","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/en\/meu-irmao\/","title":{"rendered":"My brother"},"content":{"rendered":"<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"de-1973-ate-1980\">From 1973 to 1980<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-drop-cap has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">The lack of a real father figure involuntarily pushed me into a search for substitutes.<br>The first and most obvious was my brother.<br>Eleven years older and possessing a free spirit, he was shaped under the constant shadow of a father who, in my case, was only irregular and intermittent.<br>Incredibly, our contact was also minimal\u2026 not to say no: shortly after I turned 5, he, then 16, enrolled in the School of Aeronautical Specialists.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">Considering our family&#039;s low income and the technological level in 1978, the large number of photographs he took, starting in the 1st grade in Guaratinguet\u00e1, can be considered proof of his fondness for the military lifestyle.<br>Make no mistake, all that energy ended up influencing me and, without a doubt, qualified him as\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"o-primeiro-heroi-de-minha-vida\"><span class=\"uppercase\">The First Hero of My Life<\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n<style>.kb-image187_441d34-44 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;}<\/style>\n<figure class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image187_441d34-44 size-full\"><a href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/superman-o-filme-1978-meu-irmao-superman.jpeg\" class=\"kb-advanced-image-link\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"509\" src=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/superman-o-filme-1978-meu-irmao-superman.jpeg\" alt=\"Christopher Reeve as Superman flying over Metropolis in 1978, a moral archetype for Geovane Souza.\" class=\"kb-img wp-image-213\" srcset=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/superman-o-filme-1978-meu-irmao-superman.jpeg 800w, https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/superman-o-filme-1978-meu-irmao-superman-300x191.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/superman-o-filme-1978-meu-irmao-superman-768x489.jpeg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" loading=\"lazy\" \/><\/a><figcaption>Fiction as an ethical pillar: I regret seeing the greed of publishers transforming heroes into moral aberrations, distancing them from the honor that influenced my character in childhood.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">My older sister, Geisa, had already taken me to the movies\u2014if my memory serves me right, she traveled with me to the South Zone to see &quot;Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs&quot;\u2014but my first live-action film (and not animation) and one of the most memorable experiences (and I say this in relation to my entire life!) was the absolutely incredible and unforgettable &quot;\u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0078346\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Superman, The Movie<\/a>\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">I can say that the child I was cherished and memorized every single scene, undoubtedly shaping part of my personality: I left the cinema with my heart leaping with emotion, hope, love, and honor, and even today, when writing about that occasion, it&#039;s difficult to hold back the tears\u2014you&#039;ll understand why well before the end of the book\u2014and, ultimately, the association was inevitable: my brother was my Superman!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns are-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-995f960e wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\"><style>.kb-image187_1176c1-01 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;}<\/style>\n<figure class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image187_1176c1-01 size-full\"><a href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/meu-irmao-superman-militar-eeaer.jpeg\" class=\"kb-advanced-image-link\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"400\" height=\"559\" src=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/meu-irmao-superman-militar-eeaer.jpeg\" alt=\"Jorge Ign\u00e1cio, my brother, in military uniform, ready for a parachute jump at the Aeronautics Specialist School.\" class=\"kb-img wp-image-219\" srcset=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/meu-irmao-superman-militar-eeaer.jpeg 400w, https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/meu-irmao-superman-militar-eeaer-215x300.jpeg 215w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" loading=\"lazy\" \/><\/a><figcaption>\u201c&quot;Nobody taught me this cool flying style, no bird taught me that...&quot; (Ednardo \u2014 While I Iron My Pants)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">Okay, so my brother depended on airplanes, but \u2014 wow! \u2014 he FLEW!! I remember all the enthusiasm he showed when he qualified for the &quot;Flight Mechanic&quot; specialty, the anxiety and stories about the training and preparations for his first parachute jump\u2026all recorded with photos!<br>Perhaps I hadn&#039;t yet fully grasped the concept of time, but I remember how much I eagerly awaited my brother&#039;s arrival, full of exciting news!<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">But if he arrived, there was also the departure\u2026 and that <a aria-label=\" (opens in a new tab)\" class=\"ek-link\" href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/en\/2017\/07\/sunday-2\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>Sunday afternoon anguish<\/strong><\/a> It became a somatic landmark: the whole family would accompany him to the Mangueira gas station (intersection of the old Rio-S\u00e3o Paulo highway and Rio do A) to wait for the S\u00e3o Jos\u00e9 bus. When the bus left, a bitter emptiness rose from his stomach to his mouth. He would go, and I would be left with the promise of his return.<br>My brother, my pioneer\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">All the memories I have of him reveal an intense, altruistic personality and a joy willing to overcome the restrictions imposed by poverty: a player for A Patotinha do S\u00e3o Bas\u00edlio, he was ecstatic during Flamengo games, the team he inherited from his father.<br>If I almost came to like football a little, it was his fault, because he made me endure the entire duration of a game only to, if Flamengo won, be thrown very high into the air and, upon landing, be caught in his arms\u2026 he was the only one who could do that to that huge, heavy child that I was\u2026 the only one!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">And the guitar? Until 1980, I can say that it had nothing to do with pagode (a type of Brazilian samba) and was an adherent of an intensely Northeastern Brazilian musical style, introducing the works of Raimundo Fagner, Z\u00e9 Ramalho, Ednardo, Elba Ramalho, Caetano Veloso, Gilberto Gil\u2026 the family got to know MPB (Brazilian Popular Music) through the many LPs of these artists and the music festivals that took place at the time \u2014 events whose quality time and technology have only degraded \u2014 whose songs were attentively listened to, sometimes with \u201cVigu\u201d (Viol\u00e3o &amp; Guitarra magazine) by his side, until he was able to faithfully perform them and, from there, could delight us\u2026 us and his group of admirers, who, incidentally, were not few\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">What could you do if the guy was handsome? Besides being a mulatto (with darker skin, but the <a href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/en\/2015\/04\/bad-hair\/\" target=\"_blank\" aria-label=\" (opens in a new tab)\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" class=\"ek-link\"><strong>hair better than mine<\/strong><\/a>With honey-colored eyes, he also stood at 1.83m, enough for everyone to find him very tall. Besides the &quot;glamour&quot; that a military career brought at the time, and in addition to playing the guitar, the guy also danced and was even up-to-date on &quot;Disco Dance&quot; steps... he did and was so many things that it&#039;s difficult to list them all, but I think now, risking that the images and audio might express more than words, would be a good time to share a simple tribute I prepared:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center wp-block-paragraph\"><div class=\"su-youtube su-u-responsive-media-yes\"><div class=\"lazyload smush-lazyload-video smush-lazyload-youtube\" style=\"--smush-video-aspect-ratio: 340\/600\" data-bg-image=\"url(https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-admin\/admin-ajax.php?action=smush_video_thumbnail&#038;url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fembed%2FhgWoLOUvkRM%3F&#038;video_width=340&#038;video_height=600)\" ><iframe width=\"340\" height=\"600\" data-src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/hgWoLOUvkRM?\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen allow=\"autoplay; encrypted-media; picture-in-picture\" title=\"\" src=\"about:blank\"><\/iframe><span class=\"smush-play-btn\" role=\"button\" aria-label=\"Play video\">\r\n\t\t\t\t<span tabindex=\"0\" class=\"smush-play-btn-inner\">\r\n\t\t\t\t\t<span>Play<\/span>\r\n\t\t\t\t<\/span>\r\n\t\t\t<\/span><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"catalisador\"><span class=\"uppercase\">Catalyst<\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">Before me, my brother always associated himself with the pursuit of action, always demonstrating such an intense hunger for life that I believe I have never seen the like in anyone else. In fact, even today I don&#039;t understand how he, so young and without a car, would drive all the way from Campo Grande to attend dances (or parties?) up at S\u00edtio das Morangas, at the top of Estrada do Catonho\u2026 today I even wonder: was this behavior a kind of premonition?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">I also remember one Carnival, the first one he went out dressed as a woman, when he drank too much and, upon arriving home, locked himself in the bathroom\u2026 and stopped responding! It was agonizing to see everyone shouting and trying to wake him without success, and me, very young, looking through the cracks in the door and seeing that pathetic figure still wearing a dress and sleeping sitting on the toilet\u2026 was he in a coma? The despair grew to the point where it became necessary to call the neighbors to break down the door.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">It&#039;s incredible how all my memories related to people who have consumed alcohol are, without exception, extremely unpleasant.<br>Another terrible example was Christmas 1978, when my ex-brother-in-law, duly drunk, put on his little &quot;show&quot;... this after the &quot;special appearance&quot; of my father, who took advantage of the fact that my brother had been accepted into the EEAer (Brazilian Air Force Academy) and went there just to utter a wretched phrase (which must be famous among those who lack their own inspiration and live by quoting clich\u00e9s with great gravity) that I remember with millimetric perfection:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote has-text-align-left is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201c&quot;My son, when you were born everyone was smiling and you were crying.&quot;.<br>Live in such a way that, when you die, everyone cries and only you smile.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns are-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-995f960e wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">I think that was one of the first times I became aware of the reality of death and, even worse, according to that talk, the one who was going to die\u2014damn premonitions!\u2014would be my brother! Faced with that, I was overcome by a crying fit that took a long time to pass\u2026 I think they even had to bring forward the delivery of my present (I think Geisa gave me an Autoban!)\u2026 and then I only remember playing and being interrupted by the screams of\u2026 <a aria-label=\" (opens in a new tab)\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/en\/2017\/04\/ballad-of-the-violent\/\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"ek-link\"><em>Elber Gilberto Alves Pereira<\/em><\/a>, Drunk and agitated, he was challenging my brother to go out into the street and &quot;fight&quot; with him...<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\"><style>.kb-image187_76c046-c5 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;}<\/style>\n<figure class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image187_76c046-c5 size-full\"><a href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/brinquedo-auto-ban-meu-irmao-superman.jpeg\" class=\"kb-advanced-image-link\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\" src=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/brinquedo-auto-ban-meu-irmao-superman.jpeg\" alt=\"Box and components of the classic Auto-Ban toy, a Christmas gift from Geovane Souza that served as an emotional refuge during his brother&#039;s Sunday games.\" class=\"kb-img wp-image-225\" srcset=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/brinquedo-auto-ban-meu-irmao-superman.jpeg 500w, https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/brinquedo-auto-ban-meu-irmao-superman-300x225.jpeg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" loading=\"lazy\" \/><\/a><figcaption>It was only annoying when the toy cars got stuck in the middle of the road\u2026<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">There was no &quot;fight&quot; as required, but I don&#039;t understand how, even in the face of that animal&#039;s absolute disrespect for my entire family, my sister has stayed with him... sometimes, because of this and other strange behaviors, I even question whether she is really my sister...<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">But my chapters aren&#039;t just made up of dark memories: my brother was also the catalyst for my first interstate trip, and my mother and I went by bus to Guaratinguet\u00e1 to visit him during the so-called &quot;quarantine&quot;! I remember the funny-tasting chicken we ate with guaran\u00e1 soda at the canteen; I remember the transfer we made on the way back in Volta Redonda\u2026 and I remember the loneliness I felt throughout the trip, because my mother, who only slept, faced her first erysipelas crisis right then!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"e-me-diz-pra-mim-o-que-e-que-ficou\"><span class=\"uppercase\">And tell me: For me... what&#039;s left?<\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">Until I was 7 years old, I saw this young man as so immense that I knew I would never be able to copy him\u2026 certainly, in my childish way, I envied him, but never, since that time, have I had the pretension of imitating or replacing him. In the subtitle of this work I promise that I will <a aria-label=\" (opens in a new tab)\" class=\"ek-link\" href=\"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/en\/2015\/04\/ad-hominem\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>speaking ill of myself<\/strong><\/a>, So maybe it&#039;s time to start revealing how awful I was even as a child.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">As soon as my brother moved to Guaratinguet\u00e1, he gave me access to his &quot;Homem&quot; magazines\u2014whose brand soon evolved into &quot;Playboy&quot;\u2014and, believe me, besides looking at breasts and buttocks (frontal nudity wasn&#039;t allowed back then!), I READ in detail the articles, the interviews, the jokes, and the sections that presented &quot;chic&quot; products that would make up that lifestyle\u2026all that information, combined with my passionate personality, ended up having such a strong influence that, much later, I had to stop, identify, and disown it, but that&#039;s a topic for another chapter\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">It suffices to say that I viewed all of this with such great normalcy that, even in elementary school, I was known by the other students for always having a Playboy magazine, and once (if I remember correctly, only once) a teacher found an issue with me and, taken to the principal&#039;s office, they even called my mother!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">In truth, I think I very rarely got excited by those publications, but it was interesting to observe how silly the other boys became when they saw them: for a fat boy who suffered bullying \u2014 a term that didn&#039;t even exist at the time \u2014 that magazine wasn&#039;t an object of lust, but a status symbol: reading the articles and carrying Playboy gave me social power, an armor of maturity that kept the aggressors at bay.<br>It was my first legacy of survival inherited from him... from which it took me a long time to free myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"quase-a-despedida\"><span class=\"uppercase\">Almost the Farewell\u2026<\/span><\/h4>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-justify wp-block-paragraph\">Then came 1980, and in December, my brother graduated: he became a 3rd sergeant in the air force and left to become a flight mechanic way over in Manaus, at the 1st\/9th GAv, working with C-115s and, on the side, building a musical career that became quite successful, but\u2026 we&#039;ll talk about him and all his influence on my life a few chapters later, when I&#039;ll be forced to try to recount what was probably the strangest and most terrible moment of my entire life\u2026<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A falta da figura paterna me levou a buscar substitutos. O primeiro e mais \u00f3bvio foi meu irm\u00e3o, o her\u00f3i talhado pelo voo e pela tecnologia militar&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1131,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_gspb_post_css":"","_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[9],"tags":[25,26,27,28,29,30],"class_list":["post-187","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-biografia","tag-70s","tag-anos-70","tag-exemplo","tag-heroi","tag-irmao","tag-militar"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":7}},"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":9,"label":"Biografia"}],"post_tag":[{"value":25,"label":"70s"},{"value":26,"label":"Anos 70"},{"value":27,"label":"Exemplo"},{"value":28,"label":"Her\u00f3i"},{"value":29,"label":"Irm\u00e3o"},{"value":30,"label":"Militar"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/geovane-souza-e-irmao-ignacio-1978-1024x388.jpg",1024,388,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Geovane Souza","author_link":"https:\/\/geovanesou.com\/en\/author\/gigio\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":9,"name":"Biografia","slug":"biografia","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":9,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":23,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":9,"category_count":23,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Biografia","category_nicename":"biografia","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":[{"term_id":25,"name":"70s","slug":"70s","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":25,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":0,"filter":"raw"},{"term_id":26,"name":"Anos 70","slug":"anos-70","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":26,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":0,"filter":"raw"},{"term_id":27,"name":"Exemplo","slug":"exemplo","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":27,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":0,"filter":"raw"},{"term_id":28,"name":"Her\u00f3i","slug":"heroi","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":28,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":0,"filter":"raw"},{"term_id":29,"name":"Irm\u00e3o","slug":"irmao","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":0,"filter":"raw"},{"term_id":30,"name":"Militar","slug":"militar","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":30,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":0,"filter":"raw"}],"spectra_custom_meta":{"restapi_import_id":["5bee30fb15582"],"_publicize_twitter_user":["@geovanesou"],"_thumbnail_id":["1131"],"_edit_last":["1"],"_adinserter_block_exceptions":[""],"_yoast_wpseo_primary_category":["14368"],"_heateor_sc_meta":["a:0:{}"],"complete_open_graph":["a:7:{s:8:\"og:title\";s:24:\"Meu irm\u00e3o (1973 - 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